Help parents build individual relationships with each child. Workshop exercises: 1) Schedule ten to twenty minutes with each child. 2) Let the child choose the activity. 3) Ask two curiosity questions without teaching. 4) End by naming something you enjoy about the child.
Special time need not be expensive. Consistency and undivided attention communicate value.
Encourage curiosity about each child’s personality, interests, strengths, and concerns. Workshop exercises: 1) Parents separately answer ten questions about one child. 2) Ask the child the same questions. 3) Compare assumptions with the child’s answers. 4) Choose one interest to explore together.
Children change rapidly. Knowing them requires ongoing curiosity rather than relying on an old picture of who they are.
Preserve connection when addressing misbehavior. Workshop exercises: 1) Practice: I love you, and this behavior is not acceptable. 2) Separate facts from character labels. 3) Choose a restorative action. 4) Reconnect after the issue is resolved.
Children should not fear loss of parental love when corrected. Avoid labels such as lazy, bad, selfish, or stupid.
Reduce distracted parenting. Workshop exercises: 1) Track phone use during family time for one day. 2) Create two device-free family zones or times. 3) Practice five minutes of undivided listening. 4) Ask children when they most want parental attention.
Presence is a quality, not simply physical proximity. Small predictable windows of attention can matter greatly.
Develop a regular practice of speaking hope, love, and faith over children. Workshop exercises: 1) Write a short blessing for each child. 2) Include character strengths rather than only achievements. 3) Speak the blessing at bedtime or another natural time. 4) Invite older children to bless or encourage parents too.
Use Numbers 6:24-26 as inspiration. Keep blessings sincere and individualized, avoiding pressure about future careers, marriage, or performance.